I’m Going to Get a Broom Handle

I miss your face and how I touched it,
I miss your lips and deep brown eyes,
I miss your legs from when you’re naked,
I miss your ass when clothed in pants,
I miss your hair, all black and pretty,
My hair is black and pretty, too:
Well, it’s your hair, but I have it,
And if you take one step closer to me,
It’s all going in the garbage disposal.
We’ll see who’s hair is pretty then.

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I’m kinda not paying attention,
Wearing your thighs as earmuffs,
But you keep talkin’ baby,
Just chat away, ‘cause today I’m
Taking my time, doing my best
Impersonation of a pretty–pretty kitty,
Lapping up your milk;
Come to think of it, you’re the pussy,
So I should be … your owner,
And you can be my pussy, purring,
While I pet you all night long,
Except I’m gonna use my tongue.